Pissed off...

What do you do with relatives who see your kids every week but refuse to engage your kids (one is glued to the tv/computer while the other is a couch potato). One keeps taking the easy way out by always bribing her with junk food. Most times I close 1 eye if it is after meals. But this time, he gives her 1 piece of Pringles potato chip right before dinner at 630pm without asking the parents. Even though the mummy insisted no. The other chips in to support the first one's decision. Then as expected, she asks for more chips and we refuse to give her more as it will spoil her dinner. She refuses to eat her rice and has a meltdown. My gal gets blamed for being naughty cos she is not able to stop at 1. The relative takes the chance to shout at the child to show her what is discipline. The mummy gets blamed too for spoiling the kid and poor discipline cos 'I have seen other kids who can stop at 1 chip'. "I already told her one piece only. So don't come and tell me that it's my fault!?!"

Yes, you dense man. IT IS YOUR FAULT!!!

First of all, it is wrong to offer junk food to kids without asking their parents?
Two, it is definitely wrong to insist to give it to the kid when the mummy says no. Where is the basic respect for the parents? I have no respect for people who don't even have basic respect for others.
Three, how old was the kid whom you saw that was able to stop at 1 potato chip? Was she 2.5 years old too? How many 2.5 years old can resist the temptation of potato chips and stop at 1 chip? What is more attractive to the palate? Savoury and crispy potato chip or the usual steam rice, fish/vegetables? Even a fool knows the answer to that. Even I wouldn't be able to stop at one and I'm an adult. I know my gal best, she definitely won't be able to stop at 1 potato chip. That's why I refuse to give her chips in the first place. GET IT?
Four, you are not a parent. Wait till you have your own kids, and show me what a FANTASTIC job you do with YOUR KIDS before you try to teach me to discipline mine. When that day comes, discipline your own kids the way you like. And I won't even bother to interfere though I pity the kids.

The adage says you can't choose your family. How true. But how I wish I can choose. I look at my cousin who have such great support with her toddlers and I am so envious. Her mum will cook, feed, bathe and even bring her kids out to the park. Her sisters will play with her kids, sing to them, show them youtube video clips of their favourite songs/cartoons, cut fruits into small pieces and make diluted ribena for them, even watch and supervise them when they ate. When she is out stationed, her mum will ferry her kids (by taxi/bus not car) for their enrichment lessons.

I don't expect them in my family to help out with my kids. After all, they don't even help to set the dinner table and have to be 'invited again and again' to even walk into the kitchen to have their dinner. You complain that my kids are not close to you but when I bring them over every Sunday for 3-4 hours, you don't bother to spend time or bond with them.

We definitely don't get to R&R when we are there cos we need to do everything ourselves. Worse, I've got people who sabotage and make things difficult, insist that they are right, then complain that my gal is naughtier and naughtier everyday. Makes me wonder why do I bother to bring my kids over in the first place? For the sake of kinship? I definitely don't feel the family warmth tonight.