Birthday celebrations for Raelynn

Duh, RaeAnne's birthday is on 22 Jan and Raelynn's birthday is on 2 Dec. Was wondering whether to celebrate together so that I can get a nice cake and catering. Furthermore, RaeAnne will be going to a new school in Jan 2011 so I don't think it'll be very fun for her to celebrate her birthday in a class of very new friends of 21 days. But how to settle the cake? Who gets to cut it? Will I be stealing the limelight from Raelynn's 1st birthday bash if I do a combined one? After all, cheh Cheh's had her own show with 'birth to twelve months montage' and I even rented toys and got helium balloons for the special occasion. Dilemma, dilemma. :P

Miss long winded...

Call me superstitious but I knew once I talk about the partial success we have with RaeAnne's sleep training, things will happen. True enough, tonight she came out more than 10 times from her room to look for me.

Every excuse equal to 1 visit to my room and I got to accompany her back to her room/bed, kiss her goodnight, say 'Bye Bye' to her, walk back to my room but before I know it, she's back again with yet another excuse. Got to commend her for coming up with so many excuses to make her visit to my room sound more genuine.

It started at 1040pm
"Mummy, I want to shh shh (yes, she did pee)."
"Mummy, off the fan"
"Mummy, I want to ng ng in mummy's toilet bowl (yes, she did poo in my toilet)"
"Mummy, I don't want this already (returns me my hp)"
"Mummy, I don't want this already (hands me her soft toy squirrel"
"Mummy, where Daddy? I want Daddy to sleep with me."
"Mummy, hen3 re4, I want to change shirt" (of course hot lar, since you asked me to switch off the fan)
"Mummy, cut my nail (shows me her partially chewed on finger nail)"
"Mummy, my leg itchy (shows me the sole of her foot with a red mark, wants me to scratch it but refuses mopiko)
"Mummy, I want to hi5 Mummy"
"Mummy, I don't want to sleep"
This dragged on until 11.05pm when I cannot take it anymore cos it's delaying Mei Mei's dreamfeed. While I tried to BF Mei Mei, RaeAnne came into the room again. Got hubby to deal with her. She screamed and throw tantrum and woke poor mei mei up. Arghh! Fed up and slammed the door to shut out the ruckus. Luckily, Mei Mei suckled and went back to sleep.

Sigh, in hindsight, I think we brought her back from MIL house too late. We left at 850pm after my shower. But she was already tired and rubbing her eyes. Told hubby we need to bring her back by 830pm next time. Got to factor in wind down time for her. Want her to start rubbing her eyes on her bed not elsewhere. :P

Also, I am still sick (down with cold), slept the whole day so she spent the day at MIL house. MIL fetched her after school. Maybe RaeAnne is glad to be home and wants to spend more time with me. That's why she keeps saying she doesn't want to sleep.

Fed Raelynn avocado puree (mixed with EBM) and she likes it. :) Cheh Cheh hated it but then I wasn't smart enought to add milk then. This time round, I checked the Annabel Karmel book and realised that need to add milk. Hee Hee.

My poor brother just found out that he has HFMD. And he said he did carry Raelynn last Sunday when we went over for dinner. Eeks! Poor RaeAnne already got that last year. Keeping all my fingers and toes crossed that Mei Mei will escape this infectious disease. Cos HFMD causes mouth ulcers, the poor baby cannot suck milk and will lose weight really fast. :(

Sleep chart - part 2

We started using the sleep chart for RaeAnne since 8 July, today is 25 July so it has been 17 days so far. It helps to establish a sleeping routine so that she knows what to expect and what she is expected to do (aka sleep on her own in her room after all the 'before sleeping tasks ie drink milk, brush teeth, read her a story, sing her a song, go to potty' have been completed).

There was an article on sleep training that I read on young parents. So I decided to incorporate the tips together with the sleep chart. I started out with sitting beside her cot bed then 1 day later, I started to sit closer to the door, then sat outside the room facing the door, then sat outside my own room. Of course, she protested in the beginning and keep insisting that I sleep on the toddler bed with her. Something which I started doing to get her to nap since late Feb this year. But in a way she had no choice cos if I told her if she doesn't want to let me sit where I choose and I will close her door and just leave her to sleep.

Well, the verdict is that all these helped. She is now able to sleep on her own bed in her own room. Although she still runs in and out of her room a few times before settling down, at least we don't need to squeeze ourselves on her tiny bed anymore and wait until she falls asleep. Still need to give her a cuddle and good night kiss but I'm ok with that. She's still our darling little gal after all and I want to let her know that she is loved especially at bedtime when we forgive all her naughtiness for the day. She still wakes up at night on most nights to pee or because she had a bad dream but usually putting her to potty and a hug/kiss works to let her go back to sleep. :)

Raelynn is able to climb off the bumbo chair and stand with its support. Looks quite cute when she does that. Machiam like model posing for photo beside the bumbo chair. But it also means that we can no longer use the bumbo chair to restrain her. :P

Arghh!!! I am falling sick, scratchy throat, phelgmy and sneezy. Hate to fall sick cos I always end up spreading the virus to the 2 gals. :(

Bo gey no more!

Mei Mei has been sucking on her lower gum, she looks like an old lady n sometimes a little goldfish. So cute! Checked her gum n yes her bottom left tooth had finally cut through the gum. Going to miss her gummy smiles after this. But hey maybe she can start eating soupy rice by dec? :)

Decided to buy tickets to the Barney show at expo on 11 sept since there is a promotion for Friso customers, 20% off all cat of tickets. Tickets range from $28 to $75 but we only bought $38 ones. It is a 65 mins prog. No point spending too much on stage shows until I am sure she will enjoy.

Raeanne is 2.5 years old!

She is 92cm tall n 13.2 kg when I measured her today. But I wonder if she is really 92cm cos when I measured her the second time, she was only 90.5cm. Duh... But she is definitely in her terrible twos now. I hope this is already the peak cos she spends so much time throwing tantrums n doing things that she should not. I just spanked her cos she cut up the pooh loves you leapfrog book. And use ball point ink to draw all over mei mei's bumbo chair. There goes my hope to sell the seat n tray next time. Arghhh!!!

Came back at 125am from cgh a&e cos of a painful bump inside my nose. A&e dr could not do much for me cos I am already taking antibiotics given by the GP. Oh well, at least I know it is celluitis n not something really dangerous. Hubby was worried that the kids will miss us when we were away but luckily the house seems quiet when we came back.

Me want to follow Nai Nai

After being woken up 3 times from her afternoon nap, RaeAnne was understandably grouchy. Mei Mei was practising her vocals in the living room. It was so loud that even though I asked Filamie to bring Mei Mei to the balcony and close the sliding door, I could still hear her clearly from my bedroom. I told her to close her room door so that Mei Mei won't disturb her but she refused. I told her she can either learn to sleep on her own (don't keep coming to disturb Mummy), or she can go and sleep at Nai Nai house next time. She seemed to understand and tried to lie down again.

But after Mei Mei quietened down, RaeAnne came to my room again. This time, she threw tantrum and said she wants to follow Nai Nai. Told her Nai Nai is not here today, she can follow Nai Nai tomorrow. She continued to kick up a fuss so I tried calling MIL and she is more than happy to come over to get her. So, off she went at 5pm to Nai Nai house. She even said she wants to sleep at Nai Nai house so MIL helped to bring her school bag and school uniform. Oh well, maybe it's a phase. Since I'm now a SAHM, I'm not too worried about the lack of bonding. If she wants to follow Nai Nai then I get a chance to spend more time with Mei Mei. :)

Canapes

Remember the salmon roe that I bought during Hokkaido fair a few weeks ago? I finally defrosted the 2nd batch. I decided to make salmon roe canapes to savour them fully. Wanted to spread tuna mayo on the Jap cucumber but the only one in my pantry is the healthy tuna flakes in olive oil. Luckily had some leftover mayo in the fridge.

Hubby said they are not bad but asked me what are canapes? Duh... Okie, I know I married a man with simple tastes. But I should be thankful, if he's really into fine dining. He'll probably start criticising my 'homely' canapes. ;)

P.S. A canapé (Spanish/French for couch[1] and known in Italy as tartina) is a small, prepared and usually decorative food, held in the fingers and often eaten in one bite.

Home grilled shishamo

Oh ya, last Fri when RaeAnne was at ILs place for dinner, we cooked a sumptuous dinner for ourselves. I fried basil minced meat again with thai chilli and we grilled shishamo over our gas cooker. haha. I love the shishamo most though a bit 'chao ta' but it took a long time to grill. Wish I have a charcoal grill then. Oops, I threw away the charcoal stove after more than 5 years since we moved in. :P



Also made chicken stew this week (added celery too though personally I don't like it) but disappointed with the result cos the chicken is very tough. Not sure if it's because I didn't stew it long enough or is it because I added the wrong seasoning or simply because Filamie cut it too small? :/ Luckily, RaeAnne likes the gravy. :)

A peaceful night

Today, MIL brought home cooked yam rice over for lunch cos she cooked a pot. She came over at 11+am and stayed till almost 1pm cos it was raining. When she was about to leave, RaeAnne said 'I want to follow Nai Nai.' Maybe it's because they have been here quite often (they started visiting more often since last week when they found out that their precious grandaughter had been slapped :P), maybe it's because I scolded RaeAnne for running into the room, opening the door and screaming at Mei Mei trying to wake her up from her nap (it was deliberate not an accident) or maybe it's because she is bored at home and wants to go out.

Anyway, I'm not complaining cos it's Friday and I was already tired after one week. Hubby needed to concentrate on writing his new book today so we decided to call MIL to see if RaeAnne is keen to stay over. If she is, she will help Nai Nai to 'tui1 chuang2' ie. move the queen size bed to the wardrobe so that she can sleep there with Nai Nai tonight. When hubby called, Nai Nai said she was waiting for us (Aw...) but after she asked if RaeAnne wants to help her 'tui chuang'. She said no, then changed her mind and said yes. Normally, this time, we will be dealing with RaeAnne's walking into our room many times cos she doesn't want to sleep alone. No way, hubby can be working on his laptop while I update our blog. :P

Oh well, think it's good for her to spend some time with ye ye and Nai nai. Poor Mei Mei has been sleep deprived cos Cheh Cheh always 'disturbs' and wakes her up (either by loud shouting or throwing tantrums in the room). Many times, she has KO on her bumbo seat at evening times. See pics for proof. Today, I went out around 5pm to have dinner with hubby (steamboat buffet at Crystal jade, we had a diastrous one with RaeAnne the last time). Mei Mei was sleeping when we came back at 740pm, she woke up at 8pm, I bfed her and she KO again. Still sleeping now. Poor gal, she must be trying to catch up on sleep while Cheh Cheh is not at home.




Noticed that Mei Mei is getting more and more attached to Filamie. For the last 2 nights, when the maid brings her over to me to BF, she will turn over from the football hold position and look at the closing door and start crying. Sigh. Can't be helped cos she is always handled by the maid. Looks like hubby and I got to start bonding more with her liao. Not fair to always neglect her just because Cheh Cheh is always demanding for our attention. Hubby suggests bringing Mei Mei over to Ye Ye, Nai Nai house more often to 'break' the bond. From bonding with the maid to bonding with grandparents. Duh... Shouldn't we be trying to strengthen the bond with her instead? :P

My Spirited RaeAnne

A Jan08 mummy shared this excerpt at the forum. And yes, RaeAnne is definitely a spirited child cos she fulfils all 9 traits. Duh...

An excerpt from the article I read called "Raising Your Spirited Child".

You've seen us at the market: we're the ones whose kids are screaming, climbing on shopping carts, begging for candy or a toy. You've seen us at restaurants: our kids hardly eat. Instead, they run around or pop up and stare at other diners. You've seen us at the playground: our kids run, jump, climb, slide, and change activities with blinding speed. You've heard about us: our kids are described as "handfuls." We're the ones who are often asked, "Are you sure he's not hyperactive?" We're the parents everyone has advice for: take a parenting class; be stricter; be more lenient; spank; have tested. But despite all your experience with us, you don't really know us. We are the parents of "spirited" kids. And through Postpartum Education for Parent's Spirited Children Support Group we are learning more about our special kids and how to manage them. Our children are normal but hard-to-raise. Difficult. Challenging. And certainly a handful.

In 1956, Drs. Alexander Thomas, Stella Chess and Herbert Birch began the ground-breaking New York Longitudinal Study, following 133 people from infancy to adulthood. Their goal was to define temperamental characteristics of children as they matured. Nine traits were defined, which we all have in some degree. It's that degree which determines whether a child will be mellow or spirited. The work done by these researchers has been expanded by two authors, Stanley Turecki, M.D. in "The Difficult Child," and Mary Sheedy Kurcinka in "Raising Your Spirited Child."

Using Kurcinka's terms, the nine traits are:
Intensity -- strength of emotional reactions. People often remark how "alert" an intense baby is or how much "personality" she has. While average kids will giggle at something funny, intense children burst into peals of laughter. When they are happy, they are always smiling, laughing, singing. When sad or upset, they are desolate, inconsolable. Intense children are very easily overstimulated. When too wound up they lose their impulse control and often hit, bite, pinch or kick for no apparent reason.

Persistence -- we value persistence in our society, and spirited kids have it -- they will stick to something for a long time. But they also have the negative kind, stubbornness. They "lock in" to ideas and have trouble unlocking. They can never take "no" for an answer; they'll ask for the same thing 20 times in a row if allowed.

Sensitivity -- low sensory threshold for noise, lights, emotions, temperatures, tastes, smells, clothing. Spirited kids are physically sensitive to environmental factors. Lights can't be too bright, noises too loud, clothing too tight or scratchy. Dressing a sensitive child is a special challenge: shirts have itchy tags, pants have elastic waistbands, and socks are full of lint and other booby traps (Kurcinka asks, "How do you deal with a child who can feel the 'seams' in tube socks...?").

Perceptiveness -- Perceptive kids notice everything around them. The smallest detail seldom escapes them. However, these details provide distractions which make completing other tasks difficult. Perceptive kids are often accused of not listening, when in reality, their attention is simply focused elsewhere. Adults have learned to screen out stimuli which are not important -- for example, we often drive on "auto pilot," not paying attention to anything around us except the other cars. Yet, we complete our task without mishap. Perceptive children have not learned to screen out extraneous stimuli, nor have they learned which stimuli are more important to attend to than others.

Adaptability -- to transitions, surprises, changes in schedule or routine. This is the trait that causes a child to melt down about a sandwich. She can't handle getting rectangles when she was expecting triangles. She's not being picky or demanding, she just doesn't adjust well to changes or surprises.

Regularity -- of eating, sleeping and bowel habits. Spirited kids often have irregular body rhythms. As new parents we are told that we will soon learn to distinguish between our baby's various cries. But for the parents of spirited kids, this is not always the case, since the child's eating, sleeping and elimination patterns are not regular. My own daughter, now 4-1/2, still has some problems sleeping through the night, and usually gets up before the sun. Nothing we have tried improves her sleeping patterns -- that's just how she is, and we have learned to adjust.

Energy -- activity level. Most (but not all) spirited kids have limitless energy. From morning until night they are moving. My daughter tap danced all through my pregnancy. When I had an ultrasound at 17 weeks the technician said, "I'm having trouble getting a good picture because the fetus keeps moving too much." Nothing has changed since then!

First Reaction -- to new people, places or experiences. Take a spirited kid into a new situation and they will turn shy and clingy. They need a few minutes to warm up. Ask a spirited kid a "yes/no" question and the first answer will most certainly be a resounding "no!" With a little encouragement and patience, these kids will try something new -- we just have to wait until they're ready.

Mood -- While some spirited kids have generally happy or sunny personalities, others tend to be serious, analytical and cranky. They are not trying to be difficult, this is their disposition, which is directly linked to brain patterns. These kids tend to see what's wrong with things instead of what's right. They don't display their emotions easily, so determining when they are happy is hard. There are no management techniques for moody kids; parents learn to cope by realizing that their kids can't help how they view the world.

These nine traits do not each exist in a vacuum. They also interact. An energetic, intense child may turn into a whirling dervish in an exciting situation, as she becomes more and more overstimulated. An irregular child who is starting to lose it due to hunger may reject offers of food, because of his automatic first reaction, then may continue the rejection due to persistence (persistence seems to interact with all the traits).